Trust in Faith
by delf
Summary: Xander visits comatose Faith and his world changes


A post Graduation Day (2) fic. Pre season four. Liberties taken, it is told by Xander's POV. Oh yes, and no feelings towards Anya, but The Prom stands. My first long stab at Buffy-fic (several done, just not for anyones eyes...) In my story, Xander's obsessed with Faith, think The Zeppo and Consequences. Pre This Year's Girl. Hope you enjoy it~next half of the story will be up soon. The seperator bars mean gaps in time.Remember, I own nothing, not the characters a nd certainly don't claim to be Joss Whedon, David Greenwalt, Ty King...et all. Just a piece of fanfic. For language 17 plus. delf~mail. 

The bruises faded. Hair had the guise of vibrancy courtesy of humidity. Body gaunt with with various tubes here and there. Fed from bags of clear liquid. It had been too long. Even for her. Maybe this is what mercy killings are about. She'd of fought it. No one's fighting for her now, not herself, the caregivers...or even me. So this is how it is, until the spirit inside realizes it's moot, and give some other girl a go. Maybe to have what she couldn't or didn't. 

Standing guard daily, gives me a lot of time to think away from the others. Maybe I'm not even there for her, just being selfish. A false white knight. But no one knows I come here. Which is fine, I don't need to justify what goes on. You can blame a lot on how you grew up, but ultimately it's you who hold yourself back-all that stuff doesn't mean squat when it's time to fish or cut bait in situations. I should know. 

Even skeletal and sleeping there's a kind of peace to her. Without all the bad girl makeup she looks young, maybe even innocent. Like all she's seen and done happened to some other girl. I think despite every- thing, I fell in love with her, in a sick nonreciprical way. Detatched on that thought makes me realize fully how it was with Buffy and Angelus you know, When's a rose not a rose? 

Have to head off to my night shift in a while. Always hate leaving, goodbyes aren't my best thing....Everytime I head off, I wonder when the Council is going to come and snuff her. You know those bastards want to with Buffy quit them and......Sure that bastard Wesley will snitch to them faster than Willy does for a double sawbuck. 

Going to leave for my road trip in a couple days. Put it off pract- ically a month. Sure no-one thought I'd go anyway. Not this time. Time to take an unexpected route and just do it. Sunnydale Public Library. My haven for the past few weeks. I sign onto the computer and do searches to learn more about Faith. Suprisingly, it's easy to sneak around once online. I pay attention to everything more than people would guess.Thanks Will, you've helped me by underestamating me more than you'll ever know. Wesley did give me a valuable piece of info though. A name. Callahan. Mary Callahan. Right before he hightailed it.. 

Faith Mary Callahan. I typed away looking for back doors to glean info from PS' in the Boston and surrounding area. My eyes are bleary from information overload and nothingness. Time to look around and see what the librarian is up to so I can sneak a couple Ho-Hos. Tired of looking for backdoors I tried out a standard search engine entering Faith's full name..While waiting for the result page to load I tore into a Ho-Ho. 

As expected, the search string brought up a lot of pages on religion and personal pages. Scrollin' down the line didn't bring up anything interesting, but then something interesting. A url with the desciption reading Tribals by Fred, Allston MA. Should kill some time, why the hell not? Clicking onto the link brought up page of thumbnails of tribal tattoos. The small images of swirling indigo and black were running into each other. I rubbed my eyes to clear focus. Bingo. Random. After exhaustive searching-The HARD WAY-I found it like this? Impatiently I drag and click on the thumbnail. The page was a series of beginning to end. 

Pictures of a drawing, then stencil, a transfer, then an arm. Next series black outline, then shading, the pictures of 'work in progress' showed a raised, slightly bleeding tattoo. Finally paydirt. The happy customer, a younger looking Faith smiling and showing off her new tat, her other arm around a Betty Page looking girl. A caption under neath reading "Faith Callahan and Lynne O. @ Garment District". 

Immeadiately I printed out a couple copies of the page, then proceeded to look for the homepage to find out where and when this was done. After looking around the site, I saw a few pictures of the other girl with more art and recent dates; so she was still in the area. 

"I'm sorry young man, but the library is closing in ten minutes. I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to sign off for the evening." Looking up I saw the face of the librarian, she was a nice woman, older and patient. Now couldn't be a worse time to intrude, so I mumbled something about 'right away'. Taking one last chance I printed out the next linked page. 

I was supposed to show at the Bronze and hang with the Scoobies. But this info was too hot to just sit on, so I made my way home. Empty as usual. Good no distractions then. Spreading all the printouts on the kitchen table I took a hard look at everything. Faith looking happy and young, her eyes not too clouded yet. Maybe right before Kendra died. A pre Slayer shot, I imagine. Or at least very early. The page I printed out last, had contact info for the tattooist Fred. Well Alexander LaVelle,looks like your headed to Boston. 

Boston MA. After an exhausting bus trip. To conserve $$$ I arrived. Pulling into a P&B bus station I take a look around, and peruse my handy dandy map. Fine I'm here...but where do I go? Wandering around the station I spot a phone booth with three ungodly sized directories..yellow, business...residential. Taking a glance around I flip through the pages looking for listing's of Callahan's. 

If my eyes were bleary from staring at the computer, it's nothing compared to the numerous Callahan listings and variations, and this wasn't even the whole phone book but Brookline's listings. Jeez, I'm over my head. What do I expect to accomplish? Overwhelmed. Confused. Want to be sleeping. The tattooist guy! Yes, well there's at least a where. 

After a couple flailin' missed attempts at waving down a cab, I managed it and headed towards Allston, the cab driver's defencive driving putting me on edge. The driver dropped me off on the curb where a bunch of walk ups were built impossibley close to each other. Area wise, it looked pretty good, seemed to stretch out forever. Walking down the block I looked for the building number. God, is everything on Commonwealth Avenue in this city? 

Finally, here's the building. Taking a last look at my printout for the name, I look for the guy's name next to the buzzer and press away. Just then a girl walked up from behind me and put a key into the door as I pressed the button again. "Looking for Fred? He's not there. But in about half an hour, you can expect him. Would you like to come up? I'm Lynne, his apprentice." 

Turning I saw the girl from Faith's picture, she looked the same, still had her forties attire and Betty Page appearance. Seeing her in front of me shocked me, now here's something unexpected. God Xander, breathe. How about shutting mouth and giving her an asnwer. Think smoothe. 

"Hi, coming up is good. Sure. Ahh, I'm Xander" I said sticking out my hand awkwardly. Lynne giggled and took my hand and gave it a firm shake. 

"Follow me. The elevator is ancient, so we're going to have to use the stairwell." 

I waited as she unpacked some groceries and picked through the mail. Lynne offered me something to drink before settling down in the chair in front of me. 

"Do I know you? You don't look familiar to me, Fred do a piece on you?" Great, cross examing style. I thought I was going to put her on the spot. Wonderful Xandman, thinking things through as always. 

"No actually, I saw some of his work on the net, and recognized a friend of mine." Shit, was it too early to play this card? 

"Really? Who?..If you don't mind my asking" She looked at me directly, not supsiciously at all. "Faith Callahan-' 

"Faith, oh lord? You know Faith,?" Now the eyes darkened and darted around my face looking for something. Need a back up...need another plan 

"Yeah, and I wanted to get one of those tribals. The work is solid" Did it work, did it work, did it work? Solid? A real head shakin' moment. 

"I'll have to look in the appointment book. That website, dag. Fred's looking to get caught, all work is underground here." She said shaking her head, and looking through a planner on the table. Lynne handed me a larger bound book. 

"I'm his apprentice, here's work that I've done. Although I'm not big on the tribal tip." Like that's what I'm here for... I took the book and flipped through it, feigning heavy interest. Her work was good, but not why I'm here. Ooh, naked chick-No. No naked. Bad. 

"You aren't local are you....Do you know where she is?" Looking up Lynne was looking at me with her head slighlty bowed. 

"No, I came out from California. Yes,um I do" How much do I tell? If I spill everything, maybe this girl wont give me any info. 

"Is she okay? Dag. That picture you're talking about on the site. Was about the last time we hung out. Faith stopped coming around, and everything. In fact, after that I got about three or four postcards from the South, like Florida I think one of the cards said." Oh. Oh. Gator wrasslin' story. That would make sense in the Faith timeline I'd built in my head. Missouri did she mean? 

"Faith, started hangin' with this older woman, and would blow off plans. Not that she was always Jane-Obligation. Got too busy for us I guess. Her mom told me she ran away." 

"Did she report it?" What made me ask that? Hmm, must have been her Watcher-the older woman. Lynne laughed and shook her head, when she looked up she wore a sad expression. 

"Eileen? No, she's a ragin' alcoholic. Surprised she was sober enough to even realize Faith was gone. Oh, Faith's step dad, now there's a prize. Besides...Eileen's dead." She bit her lip and looked away. I recognize that look, the one that says 'I said too much'. Dead? Great. Nice guy. Taking a chance I was going to forray into some assumed sitchs. 

"Did her hurt her?" Lynne just nodded. "She never said anything. Where is she now?" Definitely making her nervous. Not good. Too intense. 

"In California." 

"Woah. Do you mean to say you came cross country for this? I don't get it, if you knew where she is-" 

"She is in a coma. That was so not the way, I wanted that to come out ." Xander, reigning King of Cretins rocking the crown for another banner year. 

"Why are you here?" She said flatly, with her voice melding with Faith's similar accent and inflections. "What do you want?" 

"To find out more about her, to know her better. When I knew her, she was hurt. Lashing out at everyone and thing. Taking up with the worst people. I use the term people loosely." I said thinking of her pairings with the now dead beasty mayor. 

Lynne stood up and walked into another room, I got up and followed her, into a stark white room, with a dentist like chair and a bunch of clinical looking things. She dabbed a tear away and picked up a bound book, with bunch of flowers on the cover. 

"Here's a bunch of pictures of Faith and me together from little to right before she left." Lynne handed it to me. We both turned hearing a key in the lock. "Put this in your bag, hide it...Now!" she said when I faltered. Mystery guest, the man of honour Fred. 

That wasn't good. Fred didn't really dig on my asking Faith questions. He'd an annoying habit of interupting Lynne if she answered a question. Finally he told me I should go. Lynne walked me down and gave me a key to her place when I said I hadn't a place to stay yet. That was good of her she doesn't know me from Adam. So I cabbed on over there and tore into that album she handed off. 

Pictures of Faith and Lynne together at a birthday party. Faith looked haunted in some pictures, and others really happy. Taking a close look, most of the birthday or holiday pictures were at Lynne's. Teenage pics, school pictures, at clubs....Pretty soon they were morphing into the girls you see now. The clothes got darker and more vintage as time went on. Subtle things like more earrings, more makeup, darker eyes. It was like watching Faith grow before my eyes. 

Some of the things I'd seen and heard in rumour meshed. There was a pic out of the binding of Faith and Lynne standing next to some guy, his face scribbled on with marker, the two with twin uncomfortable expressions. Shot in the dark-guessin' that's the stepdad. A couple of hours later Lynne came home with Chinese food boxes.My stomache lurched, neglecting food was becoming a bad habit. One that I can't recall every experiencing. 

"Hi-I brought some food, I hope you like Chinese. Bought the usual staples. Hope you found your way around , got comfy. Ahh, the folks are away-so it'll be private. My sister will probably come over though." She sounded genial and I helped her carry the food into the kitchen. 

"You didn't have to go to all this trouble." 

"Xander, you told me Faith was alive. It clouded my judgement dig? So please don't be a killer." She laughed. "I was kidding." Lynne tacked on when I didn't laugh. 

"Sorry, I've been distracted." She brought out some plates and we settled in at the table for some droolworthy chow. 

"I'm going to appologize for Fred's behaviour. He's kinda guarded when it comes to the subject of Faith. Laid into me for talking so much. Fortunately I was able to save by way of telling him you dig the work and came cross country for it~ He's five by five though." 

"Didn't figure a big ol' guy like that would believe it." 

"Yeah....look, any question, ask, the pictures, ask, feel free. I feel like I owe you, with you saying she's...How long has she been comatose...What even happened.?" How do you play this. My mind is racing, I understand only now why Buffy did what she did, but it wasn't all on Buffy's head..Construct some factoids.....pretend your answering a question in class. 

"She fell in with the wrong people...when I say people, I mean just barely. Faith got into a fight one night, on top of a building ..As I heard it, a knife fight then she fell off the lip of the roof...ahh into a truck...It's all pretty vague." No need to spill just what I know, like say pull the murderess card. 

"God. That's horrible..I mean, a coma. Damn, always sort of harboured this fear that she'd fall in badly and get her self killed...Or worse" Or worse? Did she know about the slaying? All uglies of the world. 

"What do you mean 'Or Worse?' ?" Way to scare her anxious boy. 

"I don't know what I'm sayin' You know, make up scenarios in your head kinda thing." We'd eaten in silence. Lynne's sister had come and gone, grabbing a bite then heading out. Seemed pleasant enough. We went through the photo album, she told me stories and I asked questions. If it weren't the situation, it'd of been a good time. But that was a million days and a couple of murders ago Faith. Why? Were you really hurt bad enough to kill? 

"Um, I want to go-Back to Sunnydale with you-Or just to Sunnydale. To see her, I miss her...Especially since you don't seem to think she'll be okay much longer." Every second away that ticks, the Council could be murdering Faith, or carting her back to England. Hey why the hell not, friend o'Faith, practically stranger. Why should we believe eachother? Who'se lying, or are we both telling our truths? 

Hundreds of miles and days away. Bus trips are boring. Dodged a bullet on that one eh? Imagine if I'd driven. Yeah, ROAD TRIP! Good idea. What am I an idiot? Lynne's asleep, we should be in Sunnyhell within five. Just one more twinkie, then a nap.... 

"Now entering Sunnydale, enjoy your visit." The driver bellowed. Well, there goes my beauty sleep. 

"We're here." A voice next to me said-who'se? Oh yeah Lynne. The mind,eh? "Let's roll." God, who am I-Optimus Prime? Again with the giggling. Xander Harris: Smoothe Operator. "We can either take a bus to the hospital, or to my house and go by car..Ladies choice?" 

Am I really prepared to bring someone in who really knows her? To even have told this girl? Can't back down now-just five more steps. Lynne was speedily making towards the door. Everything looks like a movie, you know, all slo-mo reel. She's walking quick, but I'm seeing it all small and fish eye. 

"I'm sorry, but Miss Callahan can't have any visitors now. You will have to leave." I don't recognize this nurse? Practically on first name basis withall the nurses assigned to this wing. Callahan? Alarms ringing! 

"I'm here to see Miss Wilkins." Calm down, act like nothings wrong. Lynne's darting looks at me and the nurse, just ready to say something. Oh help. The nurse turned her back on me and came out with another larger male nurse. 

"Five minutes." 

"Thank you" Lynne and I said in unison. Five mintues. That's not a long time. Especially not on a gut feeling. Gotta be the Council. Think Xander think...I can't sneak her out if she's dependant on these tubes for breathing and eating..God, Giles? What do I do? 

"Fay..Faith. Can you hear me, Oh...Why'dja go......" I shut my ears off, trying to think of how to get out of this situation. I'm probably the only person, 'sides Lynne who wants to save her. Maybe if Lynne knew everything, not her either. The phone...dial....ring,,,ring ring...Dammnit pickup! 

"Hello, Mr. Giles speaking." 

"Giles, oh man...big trouble at the hospital.." I lowered my voice so as the cronies outside the door and Lynne can't hear. "About Faith, I think the Council is trying to either kidnap her or kill her, I can't say more, but you gotta believe me and get here quick." What now...shit here they come. Slamming down the phone, I walk up to them. 

"Please just another five, ten minutes. This is her best friend, she's been missing her.. long story. Ahh, please." Good guy. Glowering at me ...nice. Did they buy it? She's looking at her watch..... 

"Another five and that's it. Tight schedule. Miss Wilkins shouldn't be seeing anyone in her state." Good, my Wilkins cover worked. Thank you confirmation, you WC trash. Ooh, idea...Glancing down at Faith, her condition hasn't changed...What's that red mark? Pulling the cover it's sticking slightly, at the bend of her arm. Needle marks? More like jammed glass marks? You can see every vein up the arm from that mark. What the hell's that squeaky noise? 

"Oh God FAITH!" Woah, Lynne shuddap! Do you want those Council freakshows coming in. Maybe they put some kinda poison in her veins, or a cure...All I know is she hasn't moved a muscle, much less a sound since Graduation. 

"Lynne, you gotta be quiet okay, just whisper. Um, the nurses'll be back in a fewthis is, ahh normal.." I suck at lying. I suck at lying. I suck at lying. New mantra. 

"But-" 

"No buts, please you have to just trust me." Faith made more gasping sounds and her hand shot up to pull out those nose tubes. How can she move so quick, or at all? The Council must have done something. I mean come on those muscles were atrophy central. "Where?" Faith choked out. Okay, fish or cut bait, better choose fast Xand? She grabbed at the introveinous tube in her other arm pulling it out in a swift tug. God I'm gonna be sick. 

I grabbed Faith and swung her over my shoulder. Fortunately we're on ground level. Whispering to Lynne to be quiet and follow me, she surpri- singly did without question. Lynne's probably used to less then the up and up whencomes to Faith. The machines from lack of body were making flatline sounds, so we exited the window and made a full on run. 

Going round to the front I see Giles just pulling into the lot. He sees us, good. Faster, come'on put the pedal down G-Man. As soon as he's stopped I open the door and put Faith in the back then climb in, telling Lynne to get in the front. 

"Drive Giles!" Again with listening to me two whole people. 

"Xander, what have you done?" 

Faith looked to be sleeping and Lynne looked ready to explode with questions. "It's the Council, they must have injected something into Faith, she kinda woke up, and took out her resucitator. So I just grabbed her. They are up to something! Oh ah, Giles, Lynne, Lynne Giles" Yeah good intros. 

"Xander, I can not abide this~ This is a terrible mistake! Do you know what your are doing?" 

"Hi, new here, what the hell is going on? Who are you people?" 

Welcome to the fold. The hard way. Should I let Giles field this? Lynne looked altogether stunned, and Faith was sleeping, but the colour was returning to her skin, and it almost looked like her muscles were tight, well at least in her arms. Must be imagining it? 

"You know what, this is all too tapped? Faith was into some hardcore stuff-But hello, vampires, demons and slaying. I just can't believe this. Knew I shouldn't have come cross" 

"Lynne, I know that this sounds most bizarre. But I must assure you that it is all true. I don't know what I could say that could appease or make example. You must trust that we want the best for Faith." Go get 'em G-Man. 

Hindsight, what if we took the newly concious Faith and she's still hating us and murder prone...or maybe she's amnesia gal? Heard Giles clear his throat and ask to see me in his kitchen. We excused ourselves. 

"Xander, what have you done? Who is this Lynne girl?" "Just what I said, the Council was there, it was them, cause they called her Miss Callahan!-What more sign do you need man!" 

"Xander, even considering what you are saying is so. How do you expect to deal with the situation? Have you thought out the serious consequences in removing Faith from her primary care? Potion, or no---" Just stop talking. Panic is setting in what if he's right. Why am I so clouded when it comes to Faith. 

"Giles, I couldn't let them take her...and do whatever to her.. She's awake now..Come on Giles another slayer!" Logical,no? 

"We must alert Buffy immeadiately. Have you considered the Council maybe tracking her-and subsequently yourself and this girl I might add. They didn't just wake her out of nicety. There's some alterior motive, no doubt, But what." 

"Can I get some water or somethin'?" I turned to see Faith hobbling over. 

"Faith-Gah---Wha-wha-what...Can I get you something?" Sure, that wont panic her. 

"Yeah, water chief." More coughing. It's freaky, her body looks completely different, like she was before the fight. Whatever they put into that syringe must have been majickal. Still raspy though. 

"Here you go Faith," I said shaking like I had been in the coma. Good spaghetti legs..that's what I need right now. 

"You know what Giles, that last idea...somehow I'd hold off on that a while." Some clucking...and verdict? 

"Yes, of course." 

Lynne and Faith have been talking...Giles is pacing and I'm trying to get clear what she says. Her mind is kind of gappy. Only remembering bits and pieces. Well, it's about an hour since we left the hospital and no Council on our tails yet. 

"Hey, could I grab a shower...and maybe an outfit that closes in the back?" Faith asked tugging at her hospital gear. 

"Of course Faith, up the stairs and second door on your left. Do you need some assitance up the stairwell?" 

"Nah...I'm good." Seems the same old Faith, but which Faith, Slaygal or Wilkins JR? 

"Xander, common sense would have alerted you to the fact this idea was utterly ridiculous. We are possibley harbouring a slayer that wants nothing more than revenge. Need I remind you she's murdered.. tried to kill, Buffy...Angel." 

"Yeah, I got it. But, the Council, I couldn't just stand by and let them do whatever they were planning." 

"You are assuming the Council's involvment." 

"No I'm not, come on Giles, who else would restore her?" 

"Faith, I'll get you some of my clothes from the car, k? I'll come up in case you fall or something.." Lynne and Faith headed up, which means guerilla interrogation by Giles. About an hour later Faith and Lynne came down, Faith was dressed in one of Lynne's retro dresses-but the bad girl makeup was back in effect. 

"Got anything I can eat around here?" 

"There are some scones on the counter top and some pasta in the refridg- erator if you are so inclined." 

"Thanks." Faith said averting both Giles and my eyes. Great...this isn't helping me figure out which Sybil she is. Faith's smart enough not to give up her cookies, if she remembers everything and to hide it...There's a spinebreaker. 

"Xander, I've a disturbing thought, take a good look at Faith, weight and muscle wise she looks just she was before the coma. Slayer aside, this kind of healing is quite suspect. I'd be curious to see if the scars from the knife remain on her abdomen. My feeling is, whoever and by whatever power ressurected her,may have restored Faith from that night..." he was whispering, and I was following along which numbed my mind to what he was saying. 

"You mean we've got full mental jacket on our hands?" She's postal...and I brought her here. 

"It is just a theory. After all we don't know how far back her memory recesses. In the short time she's been in our presence, she's spotty at best. She seems to know us, but not really..We should ask Lynne when we've the chance." Now fear. I never do the right thing. I may have brought a killer to Giles,to me...Lynne...BUFFY WILLOW..the names are pounding in my head. My motivation was selfish. But I couldn't let them kill her. 

"What's wrong with him?" Who said that? Fade to black. 

Well that wasn't very manly man of me. From what they tell me I..fainted? Rather go with passed out, than fainted...not like I prefer one over the other. Guess it's brain overload. Oh boy, I'm rewarded by a sharp headache. Faith and Lynne are laughing at Giles I'm guessing...Nevermind that I smell pizza. 

"Xander, may I speak with you for a moment in private?" Giles said bearing another box of pizza that I'm hoping is for me. 

"Yeah." 

"Faith has realized that she was in hospital. Unfortunately she doesn't remember circumstances which brought her there. Interestingly though, Faith does remember her Watcher." 

"So she's slay-ready?" 

"I didn't say that.....Her mind is seemingly full of holes, she remembers Lynne very clearly, her Watcher as mentioned, and us..Marginally. Of course she may be repressing. Worse yet, play acting to protect herself. There is no way to be sure as of yet." Oh, wait..I know how to see which face is Faith's true one. 

"Buffy." 

"Buffy? Oh Buffy!" 

"It could be dangerous...Um, I suggest when you call her, to tell her to ahh come prepared." No way I'm not pinning this call on G-Man. "I'm going to head out and have some pizzas with the ladies." I said winking at him on the way out. 

Part two coming soon. 


End file.
